Our International Adoption Experience

It's hard to know where to start, actually :-) Perhaps it's easiest to begin with the fact that my husband and I knew we wanted to be parents. And that we were very happy that through the international adoption process we would be able to do that. Our family and friends have been tremendously supportive throughout the whole process, and we're truly blessed in countless ways.

Research
We started the adoption process in the first part of 2005 by doing some research for an agency, contacting a few, and attending an introductory seminar hosted by one of them in our area. We also began the work on our homestudy with a social worker in Feb/Mar timeframe. We had not selected an adoption agency yet; at that point we were still trying to determine where we should try to adopt from and what agency we wanted to choose. So read up on how the process worked in different countries (the U.S. Secretary of State’s web site travel.state.gov has great info) checked out a number of agency sites, and started reading a few IA Yahoo Groups and FRUA [n.b. this site does have some ‘scary’ stuff as well as some very touching stories; did find it useful and practical as well]). Agencies generally don’t work in all countries, and not in all regions within a country. We learned that in different countries the process is different, and that things do change even within programs. We wanted to pick an agency we could trust, an agency that was local (in hindsight this is not a big issue), and an agency that worked in several countries so that we had some options should we get mid-process and have to change countries. We needed to select an agency before our homestudy could be finished, because agencies have some of their own requirements as to the homestudy based on their experience within the country we would choose. We decided to work with Adoption Ark to complete our adoption, and we were happy with the choice we made - they work with honesty and integrity, they were straightforward, accessible and kept us informed.

Ultimately we chose Kazakhstan. In all honesty, we did not know much about the country at the time we made the decision, but from what we read about the program there, and what our instincts told us, this just felt right. While we thought we could expect a 6-7 week trip, we figured we would both be able to swing getting that time off from work and we could do one trip. There was the potential for us to adopt two children at the same time. Along the way we also decided to travel "blind"; the Republic of Kazakhstan does not recognize ‘referrals’, so this was part of the program decision. For us this was not an issue, as we decided to put it in the hands of the people that were helping us with the adoption and travel ‘blind’ to help us find them – we knew they were out there! So were not going to get any information before we traveled about our kids, nothing to review with a pediatrician specializing in international adoption before we traveled.

So our request to the Republic of Kazakhstan was that we be allowed the privilege to adopt 2 children, up to age 3, as healthy as possible.

We’ve done some traveling in the past, and we knew this was not going to be a ‘vacation’. It was a long and sometimes arduous journey – but unforgettable, priceless, a journey of a lifetime. For those of you yet to travel, it is doable. Be flexible, “go with the flow”, be organized, and relax. Another family that had traveled to Kazakhstan a couple years before we did had written “You’re not in Kansas anymore”; that does seem quite fitting ;-)

The Paper Chase and Waiting...
And so began the paper chase. There appears to be three “threads” of paperwork – US Immigration (I600A), the homestudy and the dossier (which is a collection of documents that will go to the country, including the homestudy). While it certainly is a lot of work to get all the forms completed properly, notarized and apostilled, it is more a matter of organizing and doing it than anything else. We had several rounds of medical exams and forms for the homestudy and dossier. We were fingerprinted a number of times – for the US Government/Immigration, the state of Illinois (homestudy), and the Republic of KZ (dossier). So quite a few appointments for one thing or another, several trips into the city to get documents apostilled, etc. Glad we had a good filing system.

Our agency helped out by giving us quite a bit of guidance on what all we needed to complete, and answered questions as we made progress. Unfortunately just after we got our dossier assembled and sent off to our agency in September, we got word that the dossier requirements for Kazakhstan were changing (our agency had warned us that this may happen, they just didn't know when). So it took a bit of time to get the new requirements, then to make the revisions and resubmit our dossier to our agency for translation and final review, preparation and shipment.

We kept ourselves busy during the 'preparation and waiting' phase. Some of our miscellaneous preparations included learning about Kazakhstan – at this point we did not yet know where within KZ we would be going - learning a bit of Russian (used Pimsleur CDs, as we could each use them while on the road/commuting), reading about bonding, attachment, potential medical issues, getting immunizations... and of course paper chasing. We spent quite a bit of time getting the house ready - painting (it took me forever to decide on a color) and preparing a room for the kids, other house and outdoor projects we knew we wouldn't have time to complete after the adoption. Then there are the travel plans, making the packing list (and revising it a lot), etc.

To Zhezkazgan and Home again
We found out from our agency a couple days before we left where we would be going; actually it was a last minute change request by the regional coordinator. And thus we began our journey to Kazakhstan – and to the city of Zhezkazgan – on April 19, and ultimate return June 21 in 2006. We were in KZ for 9 weeks. After our arrival in Almaty in the wee/early hours on a Friday, we caught a few hours of sleep at a hotel and then flew to Zhez later that same day. We had the weekend to get settle into our hotel room, get acclimated to town and getting around. On the Monday, we met our kids (wow!!!!) and began the bonding period. Our court date was scheduled pretty early on, and while we were hoping for ‘the day after the bonding period’, it was not to be; we bonded with the kids for ~ 3 ½ weeks before our court date. Then it was two weeks for the appeal period; at the beginning of June we were officially parents of two terrific kids! We spent a few days yet in Zhez, and then went to Almaty to wait for all the final paperwork to be finalized, for the medical visits and then the US Embassy appointment.
We got to visit the kids for two hours each day (after our court day visitation changes to every other day), but other than that we were free to wander the town, do what we wanted. We wanted to be good visitors, be respectful and polite Americans, as well as keep a low profile/ not attract attention. (We did not generally tell people why we were really here, as we were just not sure how it would be received. So my husband ‘worked for the corporation’ and I ‘took some time off to join him on the trip, to explore KZ’. ) In the markets, restaurants, etc it was pretty obvious the moment we said anything that we weren’t locals, but we did what we could. We found people to be friendly; there were some at restaurants that had staff with English knowledge, but generally the bit of Russian we learned helped. We were the only family there in Zhezkazgan adopting at the time. Based on advice at the time from our agency, we opted to stay in a hotel instead of trying to find an apartment. (See the 'hotels in Zhez' section.)

The orphange in Zhezkazgan has room for about 100 children, we were told. The kids range from birth to age 6; not all of the children here are available for adoption. It is a very well maintained building, just recently renovated prior to our visit. The children seem to be well cared for and happy. Our visits took place in the visitor room, which we affectionately referred to as 'the green room'; it has a comfortable couch, chair, child's desk and chair. Toward the very end of our time in Zhez, it was nice enough that we were able to take them outside into the play area on premise. We brought toys and food for the kids each day (a banana, yogurt, cheerios, formula and baby food). Every week or so we would bring in diapers, as well. It does get pretty warm in the room, so would recommend people dress in layers and bring water. After a while the visits do get a bit routine - almost like "ground hog day" - but we did have a good time with the kids, it gave us that initial time to start bonding, and we really feel that the time we spent with them made 'gotcha day' for the kids relatively easy.

In addition to seeing the kids, most days would include a visit to the internet café, a bit more walking around, a regular stop at the grocery store for a few things (including bottled water, cheese & bread, some fresh vegetables, yogurt, bananas, cheerios, baby food). We brought books (not enough!), got hooked on sudoko, watched movies (dvds we brought while the laptop worked). We were there at an opportune time, really, weather-wise. We both love to get out, walk around, and the weather cooperated. Once we learned our way around we walked much of the time. We did have quite a bit of downtime, so these are some things we were able to do: walks by the lake/reservoir, exploring the open market, check out the stores and shops, tour the Kazakhmys museum, walked to the WWII monument, wander around the city.

Our court proceedings were very dignified, professional. The judge did not stick around – he was in and out quickly. That said, though, he did listen to / participate in the proceedings. Have heard stories from others in IA community about judges that aren’t listening, take calls, do work on their PC, etc. Not the case here. We felt the whole court session was very respectful of what this is all about and the significance of it. Everyone was in in professional looking attire.
We talked with our translator ahead of time as to what to expect – should we prepare a speech, etc. Based on her guidance we did not prepare a speech. She said that the judge would ask us each questions; we should stand during this, speak to/look at the judge, she would translate for us. We dressed in business attire; this was a very important day, and we wanted to convey that in our appearance as well as our demeanor.

We were able to get what we needed for both of the kids there in Zhez. We bought a couple of umbrella strollers, which served us well. By the time our “Gotcha Day” arrived, the kids seemed to be very comfortable with us – we were putting them through so many new experiences, but they’re real troopers, and they handled the changes really well.

Our stay in Almaty was enjoyable, though we still were very ready to be home. We were there for about 2 ½ weeks. There are a ton of things to do and see there. We stayed at the Hotel Kazzhol; we found it to be a good location, within walking distance of enough things to see and do, and just a taxi ride from a few others.

The flight back was long – have to admit we wouldn’t want to make that flight again any time soon. But it was doable, and when the four of us touched down in Chicago … well as Dorothy once said, “there’s no place like home”.


Timeline
02/26/05: Attended an international adoption seminar at the agency; shared the news of our decision with our parents
03/14/05: Signed on w/ SW agency to complete homestudy; still sorting out Adoption Agency (looking at country programs, timeframes, requirements, researching reputation and experience of agencies)
03/19/05: Application sent in to USCIS
06/05/05: decided to adopt from the Republic of Kazakhstan
06/06/05: Contracted w/ Agency for International Adoption; also notified SW of decision, so she could finalize homestudy
06/15/05: Received our checklist for Kazakhstan
06/17/05: Finished research on how to get a notarized & apostilled version of our marriage cert, other docs, sent off requests
~ 6/22/05: Received final draft of Homestudy
08/04/05: SW sent copy of homestudy to USCIS (needed in order to get a referral to get fingerprint appt)
08/05/05: Received final copy of homestudy
09/09/05: Get dossier docs apostilled (IL Sec of State – office downtown) 09/12/05: Dossier (and copies) FedEx’d to agency facilitator
~ 9/14/05: Confirmed from Agency that Kazakhstan was changing it’s dossier requirements; significant number of our dossier docs were going to need to be re-done
White Sox take the World Series!
09/23/05: Received our I-171H (the first one; another later with Box 3 checked)
11/04/05: US Embassy to Kazakhstan posts new dossier requirements
11/09/05: Got final details on requirements from our Agency, the forms they needed to provide, etc; get started! For ‘version 2’ of the dossier, we could ‘re-use’ 5 of the docs we had in version 1 (homestudy, passport copies, marriage cert, fin. Stmt and photos), we needed to do 18 docs (most notarized & apostilled again as well) Paper chasing ... new medicals for both of us, docs needed from the bank, etc - then more notarizing and apostilling going on
11/29/05: Docs for Dossier Version 2 Apostilled, copied, assembled & FedEx’d to agency
12/15/06: Based on conversation w/ Agency, sounds like our dossier was in Washington DC (KZ embassy) no later than 12/15 Some time after Christmas, we knew this was real and so we prepped the room for the kids! Paint, get a dresser/changing table, cribs…
02/13/06: PofA en-route to KZ
03/02/06: Agency said today that our dossier was in the 2nd Ministry (Min of Ed & Science) so it’s already gotten through the MFA(but don’t know when that was)
03/28/06: Agency sent us copies of our LOIs this evening via email
04/03/06: Visa applications sent w/ our passports to the KZ embassy in DC
04/19/06: Depart for Almaty, KZ 04/21/06: Arrive in Almaty ~1am; Depart for Zhezkazgan (ZhezAir) ~1pm that day
04/24/06: We met them!!!
05/01/06: “May Day’ or a ‘Friendship Day’ in Zhez, misc happenings
05/09/06: Victory/Military Day in KZ (local festivities, parade and ceremony
05/17/06: Court Day! The Judge approved our request to adopt them!
06/02/06: Gotcha/Family Day! The Adoption decision is final! The last of the paperwork process begins for new birth certificates, registration, KZ passports and exit visas
06/05/06: Depart Zhezkazgan for Almaty
06/20/06: US Embassy appointment
06/21/06: 3:20am Depart Almaty, Chicago bound!!! We’re home!